Ahh…  I feel so useless…   I wish my life wasn’t so dull.  Even with all these music/drama/worship opportunities, I get the sensation that I’m just flapping in the breeze.  Christ is my center and the only thing I’ve always held onto.  Still, I’m sure, in the light of living for him, there’s something missing or just not here yet…   I’m anxious for a revelation.   It’s like I saw the stone fly from my sling, smack into Goliath’s head, and as I cut off his head with his own sword, there was no sense of victory…   just another servant, doing a humble service.  Is it my perspective or the lack of an experiance that pulls me down?

4 thoughts on “

  1. Anonymous says:

    “Many a believer lives in the ‘cottage of doubt’, when he might live in the ‘mansion of faith’.” ~Charles Spurgeon

    It’s okay Adam, I think we all seek to live on the hill when God truly wants to mold us while we’re humbling working in the valley. I hate that feeling of anxiety, as if there’s something waiting on the other side; something we can almost touch, smell, and taste, but it seems so far out of our reach it’s as if we’ll never receive it. Yet in the light of all this, God tell us to rejoice and to “live in the mansion of faith” not in spite of these situations, but because of them, because we have a wonderful God whose promises surpass those yucky feelings of uselessness and anxiety. He’s so good… “Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.” (I Peter 5:7) He fills all the voids if you allow Him to.

  2. Anonymous says:

    Hey… I just read something that made me think of your post…

    “A Christian is called to be Jesus Christ’s own, ‘a servant [who] is not greater than his master’ (John 13:16), and someone who does not dictate to Jesus Christ what he intends to do. Our Lord calls us to no special work– He calls us to Himself.”
    ~Oswald Chambers (yes, yes, I know, I always quote Oswald ) : biggrin :

    Hope that helped a little A–dam : tongue :

  3. adam_jd says:

    I don’t mean to draw attention by being so depressing and by seeming to need it (attention). My bordom at work leads me to think about myself.  Like I said in my last post, it’s never worth it.  The king’s still the one on the throne and so long as I’m chasing Him, He’s got it all set for me, right?  I can choose to sink into stupid states of mind, or I can rise above them.  At any rate, thank you so much for taking the time and the effort to help your thickheaded brother.  You’re the ma–    the..   woman…  or the girl…  or something…  whatever.

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